Loud Noises

October 12, 2017

In honor of the recent Las Vegas shooting, and for all those who have lost their lives in the tragic massacres across the world.  You are not forgotten.

I should not fear loud noises.
As a college student, loud noises are apart of campus life but to me, loud noises are more than that.
I was in my Victorian Literature class and a door slammed.
I was not the only one to jump.
It’s not about what the noises are, it’s about who’s making them.  What are these noises connected to.  What is that noise going to do when it reaches my ears.
I walk into an older building on campus and I’m not nervous about the course content, but I’m nervous about the fact that our doors don’t have proper locks.
I’m nervous about the fact that the entrances are always unlocked and anyone can just walk on campus.
I’m nervous as I sit like a target with my back to the classroom door, waiting for someone to take their anger out on the students eager to learn, the students didn’t even have a chance.
I am not going to live in fear.
But I am going to live on edge.  And it’s a shame that I have to be skeptical of people, and I have to analyze them and worry if there’s something I might be missing when I’m gauging my first impressions of them.
I hate that as a society we must always be cautious of the unknown and no where is no longer safe.
The people we love can be the most fearsome monsters and the strangers we fear can fiercely protect us when they’re needed.
This fear does not define us but should not ignore it.
We should not have to accept this fear as apart of life, as another human flaw we have to live with.
We should not fear our children heading to their kindergarten classrooms, nor should we fear the teacher who teaches them.
Upon boarding a plane, we should not fear the people we’re sharing our oxygen with for the duration of our flight.
We should not have to brace ourselves for the worst when simply trying to enjoy a concert.
Yet we do.
So we will link arms and take a step forward or we will cross our arms and stay where we are.  We might bear arms or raise our arms or spread our arms in an embrace intended to hug the pain out of this cruel world we live in.
But we will persevere because it is human nature to fight to live.
We will face this fear.  Individually or together, we all will love. Fight.  Survive.

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